Embracing the Simpler Things

When I was younger, I’d throw myself into the mosh pit at punk rock concerts and crowd surf whenever I got the chance. I frequently stayed up all night and wouldn’t get out of bed until noon. I traveled the world – sometimes going to sketchy places – and always craved my next great adventure. 

These days, what I crave is a quiet walk in a butterfly sanctuary, or perhaps a hot decaf coffee at the end of a long day. I like sitting on the couch and watching the latest chick flick on Amazon Prime and having picnics with my family.

Being a mother to a 19-month-old and 3-year-old is totally amazing but also totally exhausting, and I seek out activities that will give my brain a rest. 

I realized recently that I’m now a boring person. And I’m totally fine with that.  

After giving birth to my two daughters, I’ve begun to embrace the simpler things in life. Being a mother to a 19-month-old and 3-year-old is totally amazing but also totally exhausting, and I seek out activities that will give my brain a rest. 

Thinking about getting on a plane and traveling to some far-flung country sounds like a nightmare. Taking a 15-minute long shower in which I actually get to wash my hair – and condition it, too! – sounds like a dream.

Growing up, I always thought adults and all the activities they did was boring. My dad would try to make me cultured by dragging me along to modern art museums and explaining why certain pieces were so important. I’d yawn and check the time, anxiously anticipating when I could leave. 

My mom loved going on walks and would invite me to go along with her. “No, thanks,” I said. I’d rather be riding my bike down a steep hill or zip lining in the woods behind our house. 

But these days, I understand why my parents liked those seemingly boring activities. 

The older I get, the more hectic my life becomes. I’m busier than ever in my career and at home. I rarely get breaks from both or some time to just “be.” When I get the chance to go on a nice walk by myself, pick up some plants for my garden or read a book before bed, I’m completely content. 

The latest routine I’ve created for myself is waking up before 7 on Shabbat morning and reading The Jewish Journal and the weekend edition of The Wall Street Journal cover to cover. Never in my life did I think I’d become an early bird, but here I am. The adults who woke up early were correct again: It’s so lovely to be awake in the quiet hours of the morning, watching the sun rise and getting some peace before the whole neighborhood wakes up. 

If my teenage self could see my adult self today, she might say, “Wow, Kylie, you’ve become so lame.” But she couldn’t possibly understand. We are not meant to live like teenagers forever. What is exciting when we are young isn’t necessarily exciting when we’re older. When I was young, I wanted to have fun. Now that I’m older, I want meaning. I want long-term happiness and not temporary thrills. My calming rituals contribute to my wellbeing and make me feel a deeper sense of joy.

In a time when the world seems crazier than ever, and life is noisy and busy, I’m happy to have my refuges from the madness. I’ll take a Sunday brunch with my husband and kids over a late night at a club any day. Give me the Americano, and keep the beer please.

One day, when I’m retired and my kids are out of the house, perhaps I’ll become a little more adventurous again. For now, I’m perfectly fine being boring – which isn’t really a bore at all. 

Are you enjoying being boring? Email me! Kylieol@JewishJournal.com.

Kylie Ora Lobell is the Community Editor of the Jewish Journal.